Clojure!

https://clojure.org/guides/getting_started emphasizes Homebrew, but MacPorts has it too. I also had to install OpenJDK too. I think for me, the minimal set of commands could have looked like:

sudo port install clojure +rlwrap
sudo port install openjdk11

clj
user=> (+ 1 1)
2

Woohoo!